How to Write and Deliver a Eulogy: A Gentle Guide
Writing and delivering a eulogy is one of the most personal and meaningful acts you can perform for a loved one.
It’s a chance to honour their life, share cherished memories, and offer comfort to everyone gathered to say goodbye.
While the idea of standing up to speak can feel daunting, with thoughtful preparation and a heartfelt approach, your words can become a beautiful tribute, one that celebrates their story and leaves a lasting impression.
Step 1: Understand the Purpose of a Eulogy
A eulogy is more than just a speech. It is:
A celebration of life – highlighting your loved one’s achievements, personality, and unique qualities.
A source of comfort – bringing solace to those who are grieving.
A moment for reflection – remembering the ways they touched lives and made a difference.
Step 2: Gather Memories and Stories
To make your eulogy personal and meaningful:
Recall your own memories – Which moments capture their essence best?
Speak with others – Ask family, friends, and colleagues for their stories.
Note important milestones – Think about life events, accomplishments, and contributions they made to others.
The more perspectives you gather, the richer and more personal your eulogy will be.
Step 3: Structure Your Eulogy
A clear structure will help you share your thoughts in a way that feels natural and easy to follow. You might include:
Introduction – Who you are and your relationship to the person.
Life overview – Key milestones and achievements.
Personal stories – Moments that reveal their values, humour, kindness, or passions.
Special qualities – What made them unique and unforgettable.
Closing thoughts – A final message, poem, or quote that feels right.
Step 4: Writing Your Eulogy
When writing your eulogy, keep these points in mind:
Be authentic – Speak from the heart. Sincerity matters more than perfect wording.
Be positive – Focus on their strengths, contributions, and happy memories.
Be concise – Aim for 5–10 minutes (about 500–1,000 words).
Use simple language – Warm, clear words are easier for everyone to connect with.
Step 5: Practise Before the Day
Practising will help you feel more comfortable and confident:
Read it aloud – This helps with pacing and flow.
Make edits – Adjust for clarity and emotional impact.
Get feedback – If possible, practise with someone you trust.
Step 6: Delivering Your Eulogy
On the day of the funeral or memorial service:
Take your time – Speak slowly and clearly.
Make gentle eye contact – If you can, connect with your listeners.
Allow emotions – It’s okay to pause and take a breath if you become emotional.
Remember the purpose – This is about love, not perfection.
A Final Thought
At Leedam, we know that a eulogy is more than just words, it’s a gift to everyone present, a chance to share the story of a life well-lived, and a way to hold your loved one close in memory.
There’s no single “right” way to write or deliver a eulogy. What matters most is the love and respect behind your words. Speak from the heart, and your tribute will be beautiful.
